Real subjects

After a ‘brief’ month long pause from writing to sort out my exams, and take a general break from life, I’ve decided to mark my glorious ascent thorough the 6th form, and all 4 a-levels that I WILL get presented with halfway through august. Whether they are all A’s remains to be seen.
So to mark the end of OCR, MEI and the rightfully maligned edexcell in my life (and because for certain reasons it turns out I’m NOT allowed to triumphantly burn all my 6th form notes and books), I’ve decided to publish the quasi-definitive list of subjects and their realism.
For those of you that have known me in any academic respect, you will have no doubt already heard of this in part, and you can feel free to indulge yourselves in an almost complete list.

Real subjects
Maths
Further maths
Physics
Computing (almost not in this list)
Geography
Politics
Biology
Chemistry
Psychology

Not real subjects (and therefore FAKE subjects)
DT or product design or whatever you decide to call is this week
English
Citizenship
Critical thinking
Any MOFO (MOdern FOreign language) especially french as there is almost no point learning to speak it in the first place

Have NO PLACE IN A SCHOOL
Drama
Philosophy
Any subject ending in ’studies’ ie media studies, film studies, puke stain studies
English literature

Subnote

While chemistry and biology have managed to make it onto the list of real subjects, it should be noted that they are actually not real sciences. In the case of chemistry, it’s the  general refusal to accept the fact electrons cam exist outside of the atom and the casual brushing over of the paths of P orbitals. The nails in biologies coffin however are the fact that there are no rules, or method to it. Its basically, just ‘remember this, remember that’. Oh, and the seemingly paradoxical qualifications system in medicine in general. I shudder to think that that my GP has less qualifications that a vet, a man who makes his living shoving his hands into dogs’ *ahem*.

I’m sure I’ve missed a few subjects off this list, so if you not sure whether you wasted two or more years of your life, just send me an email with the suubject that you wish to be clasified.